The Chad Effect

In my last post I talked about how I wanted to be more transparent... I wanted to not just journal for myself, but for anyone else that might need to learn something from the lessons I've learned and the experiences that I've had.

In the light of being transparent I just want to share my prayer for this blog...

"Father. My heart is broken for the broken and joyful for the son that you've called home. Although young deaths will never make sense, I know that you have a purpose behind it. I know that it's not something you want to keep quiet.

Lord, please speak through this blog into the hearts of the readers as I share about the death of a friend who knew you. I ask that you use his death to speak into their lives. Use my actions and words to do your will.

I love you Abba. Amen"

As I drove home this evening, I felt a pulling on my heart to write about this experience. Some people have also lost a friend recently, and they're looking for answers. Others have never lost a loved one, but couldn't imagine the agony of saying goodbye without hearing a response. Now that I'm home at a computer, all I can do is sit here at a loss for words, waiting for the Holy Spirit to fill the holes...

Chad is not the first friend I've lost. A couple years ago I lost a college friend that taught me how to worship Jesus with my whole heart and soul. Years before that I lost a friend while I was serving with Campus Crusade for Christ in Australia, and I was never able to determine why God allowed someone to be taken away who showed so much interest in Him but never allowed me to know if she had decided to follow Him. And before that I lost a friend in high school who I never even thought to talk to about Jesus.

Losing someone causes us to look at their lives and our relationship with them in a much deeper way. We spend time thinking about how they affected us and what kind of impact they are going to continue to have on us even after they're gone.

When my friend Sarah died, I was so confused. She was attracted to the joy that I had and I knew that I needed to spend time around her. I was able to work up the confidence to invite her to a Campus Crusade gathering and she came a couple times, but it never became a priority. We got closer as time went on, and then I ended up traveling to Australia. She lived less than a half hour away from me at home, so we decided that after I got back from Australia we'd hang out a bunch before we had to go back to school. I had prayed so much to have an opportunity to talk to her about the gift of the cross, and I sincerely thought God was opening that door by securing the opportunity to hang out. When that got taken away, I couldn't figure it out. I still don't know why it happened, but I do know now that there's not time to wait. Any time could be my last breath, or yours... I can't sit around and take that lightly and spend years without sharing who Christ is with the people around me and what He gave so freely for us.

A couple years ago my friend Dave was on a summer project with Campus Crusade in Myrtle Beach. I drove up and hung out for a day. I hadn't seen him for quite a few years, so it was awesome to catch up and hear about all the things God was doing in his life. I'm so glad I got to spend that time with him, because God called him home shortly after. Dave was a pretty tall guy, with even a bigger wingspan. Whenever he would worship he would spread both of his arms out wide... as if he was physically being lifted up to Heaven. Dave understood worship and the gift that it is to God in a way few people do. The way I worship now, which I know has touched people equally as much, is due to the imprint Dave left on my heart. Because of Dave, when I worship I can imagine the angels worshiping alongside me. In my mind, they don't hold back... so I can't either.




Tonight I sat through a 2 hour memorial about Chad. Friends and family reminisced about the laughter and joy that he so often brought to the people around him. A concert hall full of people showed that a 20 year old can truly leave a legacy greater than that of most grandfathers. Chad taught me joy in a new way. No situation is ever so great that God cannot contain it. No sadness or fear is ever so great that God has not already conquered it. No great work or task is so large that God cannot create us to be the person to accomplish it. No situation is so bad that God cannot turn it into good. No one is so far gone that God cannot save them and bring them home. God is so great in all situations. That joy should be flowing forward from our lives. James 1 tells us that we should find joy in all circumstances, because it produces perseverance which when tested makes us whole and complete, lacking nothing. Chad taught me what it looks like to have that joy and how to bring that joy to the people around me.


I'm so thankful that God allowed me to meet each one of these people. I'm glad that I can look at their faces right now and see that God definitely used them to teach me and affect me in great ways. I can only hope that my life will be one that is used to touch the people around me. As I often share with the people close to me... I know where I'm going when I die, so I'm not still on earth for my good, but so that God can use me in the lives of the people around me.

I sincerely love everyone that reads these blogs and everyone that has come alongside me as family and friends. I'm thankful for the people that have read this and I pray that God has used these few words to touch your heart. Right now could be your last moment... if you don't know what that means and you're concerned about what would happen to your soul if your life ended, please talk to me about it. God sent His Son to be available for everyone... don't let that free gift pass you by.

Love you all!